Mitch (2–3) vs. Pish (2–3)
The tin foil hat bowl!
Average Scores
Mitch: 140 (4th)
Pisih: 132 (7th)
Projected Scores Week 6
Mitch: 138 (3rd)
Pish: 126 (6th)
Expected Records
Mitch: 2–3
Pish: 3–2
Mitch’s Side
After starting 0–3, Mitch was looking close to death, but after two bust out weeks he’s right back alive and well — probably hanging out with Osama Bin Laden tonight!
Mitch was obviously suffering some bad luck in the first three weeks, and I expected a bounce back, but not quite to the extent that it’s happened.
Mitch has busted out 5 different 25+ point performances in the last two weeks, scoring over 170 points both times. It’s been a multi-horse showing too with six players accounting for 10% or more of his total points:
It’s a running back heavy team for Mitch, as he’s second in the league in RB points scored
Dalvin Cook, Deshaun Watson, and Stefon Diggs are the leading trio of the team and have all been pretty freaking solid every week this year
Mitch is one of few teams that really has not had to deal with injuries, and he made some really solid draft picks — I look at this as probably the deepest team in the league and I think he’ll pretty easily find his way into the playoffs despite that tough 0–3 start. I think maybe those first three weeks were just a little humble pie to knock the edge off that mouth.
Mitch has no significant bye week players and ESPN has him as a big 12 point favorite because of it. He is likely to miss Dalvin Cook, but Mattison slots right in there, so that’s not more than a couple point reduction in the projection there.
No complaints from me with Watson, Diggs, Lamb, Andrews, Gurley, and Parker all in great spots.
Pish’s Side
The Seahawks are on bye this week, which means so are Pish’s chances of scoring 100 points.
43% of your production gone quicker than that excess fat in your chest area back in 10th grade.
Pish is just absolutely hung out to dry this week, Tyler Henderson and Aaron Brown went on senior trip and left Pish at lunch by himself here, let us know how 2–4 tastes bud.
After all the smoke settles from those overly personal and uncalled for jokes settles, here is what we’re left with:
Not a very face-lick worthy group of guys there. This is probably my guarantee of the week.
Mitch Sandy Hooks Pish To The Ground,
Mitch Globalizes Embarrassment on Pish,
911 Might Have Been Fake But This Ass Beating Isn’t,
Mitch Shoots Pish And His Bin Laden Decoy In The Face,
Mitch Unites The Nations,
Mitch wins real good 155–109