Lee (1–4) vs. Clint (3–2)
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We will start this week’s gaggle of previews with the stinkiest of stink. We’ve got two globe travelers facing off with teams that look a little bit more Spirit Air than Delta.
Lee has poured himself a nice mixie of bad injury luck, surprising underperformers, and just bad draft strategy this year and he’s found himself in the drunk tank because of it.
Clint had a really great team until about 5:00 last Sunday when his foot got twisted off, and now he finds himself deep in the bunker without a sand wedge.
Average Scores
Clint: 139 (6th)
Lee: 112 (12th)
Projected Scores This Week
Clint: 121 (7th)
Lee: 124 (6th)
Expected Records
Clint: 4–1
Lee: 0–5
Lee’s Side
Coming off the league’s worst score so far:
Lee is one loss away from me declaring him dead (COVID will be the cause of death)
Lee did not get 20 points from a single player last week, which is pretty impressive, here is that scoring breakdown:
In a year where FLUF starting QB’s are averaging 29 fantasy points, Lamar (the second QB off the board) finds himself at 25:
Little tip for next year big Lee: don’t draft the 13th best quarterback in the second round (I know you already corrected me and said you took him in the third round, but second sounds better).
Of course a few disappointing games from Lamar doesn’t take away his ceiling, and he gets a pretty unimposing Eagles defense this week as he looks to lead Lee to a 2–4 record.
The one time glimmer of hope James Robinson appears to have been just that — a glimmer, and is now duller than my 98 Malibu’s headlight that one time Dan Rote threw a football through it at Jerry’s Custard.
Lee’s actual best player might be a guy who was on the couch three weeks ago, Devonta Freeman has seen 28 carries and 6 receptions over the last two weeks, but the 3.5 yards per carry and the Giants being horrible doesn’t inspire much confidence for the future.
Devin Singletary has played most of the year without Zack Moss vulturing carries and he still can’t score more than five fantasy points, so with Moss returning and Josh Allen sure to realize that Josh Allen is the best running back on the Bills, things are pretty much fucked for Lee.
But hey, at least you have TY Hilton who is the 60th best receiver in our league this year. I mean he at least has a good highlight reel from past years that you could probably watch to feel better about yourself.
Clint’s Side
All of that horrible talk on Lee’s side, and he’s favored to win this one!
Here is Clint’s scoring breakdown for the year:
So Dak had score one of every four of his teams points this year, and now he’s dead. Enter Kirk Cousins, and I assuredly don’t like that even in a nice match-up with the Falcons (although Clint might not even be able to start Cousins if the Falcons continue to test positive for dirty bird 19, so this could get even uglier which is amazing to say).
Not sure I’ve ever had such a radical change in feelings about a fantasy team after just one injury, but man Dak was really holding Clint up there.
The only other real enticing names on the list here are Conner and Robinson, and Conner is in a pretty rough spot against a Browns defense that hasn’t allowed more than 70 yards rushing so far this year — I mean that is stingier than 2008 Mitch Clee before pay day:
My neck literally hurts from looking at these two horse shit teams (although my neck started hurting last Friday, but I think it’s because my brain knew I was going to have to look at these teams so it just started the pain in advance), so I’m going to walk away.
Wrap Up
These are two of the best friends I’ve ever had but I’m honestly thinking about never talking to them again just because of how disgusting their fantasy football teams are.
Clint finds his way to victory though because somehow he always does :: 124–118
