Jon (4–1) vs. Paul (2–3)
The Pope Bowl!
Average Scores
Paul: 147 (2nd)
Jon: 139 (5th)
Projected Scores
Paul: 154 (1st)
Jon: 140 (2nd)
^ yikes
Probably not the most interesting match-up of the week with Hahn and Johnson going at it, but this is right there as Paul’s 2–3 record is pretty egregious.
Paul’s Side
He’s taken two pretty rough losses, losing by less than 2 points in week one and then falling with a big 145 in week two. He’s put up massive scores in two of the last three weeks and seems to have everything coming together this week with the highest projection we’ve seen this year by a huge margin.
Two trades have gone off for Paul already, he’s already shipped away both of his first two picks (Kamara to Clint, Julio to Colin), so he’s started a whole bitchload of players already.
None of the match-ups are really all that great. It starts with Mahomes of course, who has never faced Buffalo — what the fuck do you know! Here are his average fantasy points (DraftKings scoring)
But look, the Bills have done a good job against Tom Brady since 2014:
So obviously that means they’ll shut down Mahomes this weekend duh!
Kareem Hunt plays the Steelers, and they have been the 2nd best defense in the league against running backs since last year, allowing an average of just 10 DraftKings points to RB’s! Wow!
The only RB to have a legitimately good game against the Lers defense since last season was my boy Miles Sanders last week
But Hunt didn’t do too bad in their match-up last year, catching 5 balls and a touchdown. He’s a pretty nasty player to have with Chubb out of the picture so that really sucks for me lmao!
Last year Derrick Henry ran for 211 yards and three touchdowns against the Texans in one game, and 86 yards and no touchdowns in the other game, which is very much Derrick Henry-like. That stupid Alaskan Bull Worm Hairdo has been absolutely all the over the place so I hope my luck continues and he has some dumb 19 carries for 61 yards one target and a dropped touchdown wide open in the endzone kill yourself Paul game.
After doing 20 minutes of mental gymnastics to make myself feel better about Paul’s top three players, I still have freaking Kenny Golladay, Marquise Brown, Jamison Crowder, and Travis Kelce to deal with so this is just too much.
This is obviously the best team in the league and I don’t know how we keep letting this happen. Thanks a lot, Randy.
Paul is running lights and siren this week I’m fucked!
Jon’s Side
While I’ve had a good start to the year with only one bad score so far, we are trending in the wrong direction here. I have no bench depth and this is the last week for my first round pick to have a big share of the team’s RB work, so I can’t wait to see what God cooks up to win me this league this year.
Pretty rough match-ups the whole way down the line for me, but still massive upside with guys like Allen, Helaire, Sanders, Fuller, Beckham, Kupp, and even a little bit of double tuddy chances with Ertz.
There’s no chance I can pick myself to win here so the less time I spend on my team here the less pain I will experience.
Jon gets Paulverized:: 159–139